Surgery Day

We arrived at 6am to check the boys in for surgery.  Brandon did very well with a minor outpatient urological procedure.  He was very cooperative and was all smiles all the way back.  I think he enjoys the attention!  He was not real sure about breathing the gas mask but did fine and was out within an hour.  The doctor came to talk to us and then took Brayden back for a fairly big surgery.  He seemed nervous all morning but did well going back.  The doctor said to plan for about 4 1/2 hours so we may be 1/2 way through it now.  We had one call to update and let us know that he was doing fine. 
Once Brandon was ready to discharge, they were kind enough to bring us back to the pre-surgery room to wait.  This way Brandon can rest and watch TV while we wait to go into recovery with Brayden.  I like being close if Brayden needs us and having a place to wait in privacy since Brandon is not really up for public right now. 

It has been a little tricky working things out with two at once for surgery, but with Bo and I both on duty (Thanks to Mom and Lindsay watching the girls) it has been manageable and I am happy to be getting it over with at once.  There are some striking similarities to adopting two at once-- more hassle, more expense, more planning to make things work smoothly.  And I think the real key is enlisitng help.  This day would not be possible without those helping to care for the girls and both of us here to take care of the boys.  At one point Brandon had awakened in recovery crying for mom and they were preparing to take Brayden to surgery and Bo had to start that and I just made it in for a quick kiss before he was out.  It is best to be prepared and have lots of help!   Still it is CRAZY! 

The boys have come so far in language and attachment and everything. I feel like even the surgery is a chance for them to see us caring for them.  Just praying we can keep up the pace and care for them both.  I did find out from a nurse that the restrictions we faced with Lily's surgery (no kids visiting) are lifted this week and will begin next week so it seems as if we came at a good time.  I am hoping Bo and I do not have to spend our 31st anniversary tomorrow totally apart- hopefully we can hang out in the hospital together...like we did the year Lauryn was born and one or two times when Lindsay was inpatient for New Year's Eve-- those were some of the crazy years.  But to be fair-- some of the amazing years were spent in-- Hawaii (just before our 5th), Colorado, Downtown Charleston, twice we were in China just prior to our anniversary and last year we celebrated in Niagara Falls.  Thanks to my AMAZING husband who puts up with me and loves me and is willing to live this crazy amazing life with me!

Please keep the boys in your prayers.  I will update you when Brayden gets out.      

Check out this blog post...

I just had to share this awesome blog post.  She really touches on the heart of what you can do to support someone who is going through the adoption process.  And since many of you come to our site because you are in the process, it really is something nice to share with your friends and family so they know how to best support and encourage you.  She has a way of telling it like it is...but read to the end-- the end brought tears to my eyes-- as I agree that we have had those moments in the last 6 months when we think-- What if we didn't listen to the promptings of the Holy Spirit?  Those few special moments when I think, I might have missed this!  The past 6 months have been hard- really hard-- and yet I know and am convinced that God led us on this path and I wouldn't miss it for the world!  So here is a link to http://jenhatmaker.com/blog/2011/11/02/how-to-be-the-villagethe blog I read and wanted to share with you.

We survivied the first 6 months!

Ok so I am a terrible blogger!  I do have some great updates and pics coming soon...I just need to get through grading papers and giving final exams and then I promise to do better!  I just wanted to say we are all alive and doing well.  The boys change daily. They are adorable and loving and yet this has been one of the most difficult times our family has gone throught.  We thought that with two adoptions nder our belt, we were prepared...but this time was different.  We have all been exhausted trying to meet everyone's many needs.  I have had to learn to reach out and accept help.  I am so thankful for my mom and my church and pthers who have stopped by to visit ad offered to help out in so many ways.  The past few days I had strep and Bo was traveling out of town and I am convinced that without friends and family some of us wold not have made it out alive!  But the meds are kicking in now, three of the four are sound asleep and for this moment all seems right with the world and I feel blessed!  That is when I want to write...so the blank spaces tell you just how tought the last few months have been. 

I did want you all to know that the China Care fondation has a 10 yr anniversary video on youtube that features our son Brandon.  He comes in three pics right after the words 10 Kangs (just after 10 Dangs comes 10 Kangs) China Care Foundation -- 2010 Celebrating Ten Years!
www.youtube.com

He is a tough one, but we all think he is gonna turn out really great once he realizes that we are really gonna be here for the long run.  He had so many people love him for a year to 14 months and then had to say goodbye so we are still on probation with him.  But give it another year and he will catch on that we are different!

Keep the prayers and encouragement coming!

Love to all,
Glenda

What a difference a few months make!

I wanted to share these two pictures.  The first one was taken around the middle of June when we went out to dinner for my sister-in-law's birthday.  The second was taken this weekend at the same place and I realized how much the boys are changing.  Their hair is growing out.  Their smiles are bigger.  They feel like they have always been with us.  We were able to manage them at dinner all by ourselves.  The family seated with us actually commented on how well-behaved they are and said that we "make it look easy"-- anyone who ate dinner with us in China with just the two boys-- could you imagine that ever happening???

Everyday gets a little better.  It was a huge adjustment and I don't think any of us realized how different it would be... but it is a good different and worth it all.  Our little asian invasion is the invasion of 4 little ones into our life and family.  They have captured our hearts and stolen our affections.  Our lives will never be the same... and I can't wait to see their futures!  They are amazing little blessings and we are so blessed to have them!

A few more differences:
1) I can blog because all the kids are asleep in their own beds!  (We may have visitors throughout the night, but this is still a huge change!)
2) Brandon smiled most of the day.  He asked to go to Chuck E Cheese and how can you say no when he can say it so well and smiles so big!  (And no I did not think to bring a camera-- glad Chuck E Cheese does have a few pics for us!)
3) Brandon lost quite a few teeth due to infection and decay.  He looks funny but he seems to be happier and not in pain!
4) Brayden is still the happy little guy, but he feels safe enough now to show us when he is angry too-- not very often- but every once in a while he is not smiling!
5) Lily and Brandon can have moments of being kind to one another.
6) Kylee is settling into the big sister role.  She is such a big help and likes having special time- like staying up a little later than everyone else.  Kylee is in big school by herself and loving it!
7) Lily did not cry this morning when she had to do her treatment.  She does not like it but she is handling it so much better.

Everyone is growing up.  Everyone is in preschool and loving the routine!  Mom is back teaching a few classes and seeing a few clients and supervises. For the first time mom can drop off and pick up everyday!  And when Dad is home it is even easier to care for everyone! We are really busy with baths and lunches to pack and all that--but it is doable and a few months ago I did not think it was possible.

Birthday Party Pictures

We asked the girls to wait to have a birthday party together for their friends from preschool.  A good friend offered her pool and the girls picked the "Tangled" theme.  Lauryn helped with the cake and making 'rapunsel' hair for the front door (all the while telling me how I never did anything like that for her!).  We had fun getting it all ready and we pulled off a fun day for the kids.  I am just getting around to downloading the pics and thought I would share them.

Life is busy....

I only have a few minutes (that is my life these days) but I just had to give an update and say that things get better and better each week that goes by.  I tried to be brutally honest when things were tough so I don't want to delay in letting everyone know that things do get better!
It is still overwhelming at times and physically exhausting, but the attachment is happening and we are all settling into our life together. 
This week Daddy took Brandon to the pediatrician and she commented on how much he has changed in the past month since she saw him.  The doctor asked him if he wanted to listen with her stethoscope and he looked to Dad as if to ask permission.  She could not believe it and commented on how that is so great that he already gets that he needs to look to Dad.  Overall he is becoming so much happier and settled.  He is mostly compliant and obedient and very affectionate.  He has come so far!
Brayden is still silly and busy and all smiles.  He loves to swim and decided to go back into our friend's pool after we had taken off the swimmies while I was dressing Brandon and helping Lily with her bloody nose from Kylee accidently kicking her while swimming away.  Kylee was still in the pool and saw him step off the step over his head and pulled him up as I ran over.  He spit up water for a while.  So things are better...but I still have to learn to watch four little ones all at the same time and keep them all alive!  It is a challenge!  Never a dull moment....here in our always crazy, sometimes amazing life!

My little men!

We had an affirmation service for our daughter Lindsay and her husband, David, since they did not get to have a wedding last year.  I will post more pics when I get them.  Lauryn posted this one so you cold see the boys.  They did so well!  It is amazing to think that they have been with us such a short time. Things are settling down and starting to feel doable!  (Maybe that is just the perspective having Dad home all week and cousins around to tire the boys out and spending time at the lake...but whatever it is, it is nice to at least for the moment feel like we might be able to make this work!) 

Sleep is a powerfuul thing!

Sleep is important.  At its best- sleep can make you feel better about life, give you amazing dreams and help you sort out the frustrations of life. Lack of sleep can lead to all kinds of mental issues.  It can distort one's thinking and cause irritability and all sorts of other 'fun' things.  If you want to torture someone, take away their sleep. 

I was so fortunate with my biological children in that they were ALL great sleeepers.  Bryan was the first and he spolied me by sleeping through the might right from the start-- I finally decided after a week that I did not need to wake him up.  He was such a great baby.  Then came Whit and even though he was high energy, he liked to sleep just as hard as he liked to play.  My favorite story was when he was playing in our garage on a riding toy and I turned around and he was sound asleep on the concrete floor!  Lindsay and Lauryn followed suit- although it did take Lauryn a little longer to sleep through the night but she was so darn cute that I did not mind getting up.

But when you adopt toddlers- it is like starting atthe baby stage but with a child who can walk and talk and cry and pitch fits!  Kylee struggled with sleep for years.  But she would go to sleep without a problem- with US in our bed.  And now she is able to sleep in her own room and no longer has night terrors.  It was a rough time with not a lot of sleep, but she did not have problems going to sleep so I just got used to going to bed earlier or taking a nap and we got through it.  Lily is a lot like Whit and always seemed to sleep pretty well so it was an easy transition when they both went at the same time to their own room.  And for the last about a year we have had it pretty good.,,,and then we started all over with TWO.
Brandon was hard to get to listen at first but now he is fairly c.  ompliant with going to bed- on a mattress beside my bed.  Bryaden has a mattress there too but he prefers/insists on being in our bed.  That was fine when we were in China that first week with just hiim enjoying the last bit of the baby stage.  I figured he needed to catch up on some mothering and all.  But he really does not seem to need much sleep, does not like to go to sleep and doesn't ever seem to stop!  He is sweet and charming so that helps but he is tiring. 

Saturday we had gone to visit some great friends and the kids all had a blast swimming and seemed thoroughly worn out and full from dinner so I thought I was set.  Sure enough the boys fell asleep on the ride home and I even drove around the neighborhood a bit to make sure they were good and out.  I always prided myself on my ability to bring kids in and lay them down without waking them up so I was sure it would be a nice quiet evening... not so much!  After carrying them up the stairs-- and they are not that light- but it is good exercise I suppose--they each in turn opended their eyes and wanted to get up and play.  I firmly said "no" and went through my repetoire of bedtime routines until I was exhausted.  They asked to watch their Chinese cartoon so I agreed and told them as long as they stayed in bed-- that worked for about 5 minutes.  At the end of it all 3 hours had passed before the kids were actually asleep and I felt like I had been in a major battle!  And then there was the interruptions through the night...

Then it was Sunday...  To be perfectly honest the thought of getting 4 kids (5 if you count a sleepy teen) up and ready for church all by myself was overwhelming.  But I decided to give it my best. I even planned to go early for the women'sclass-- good thing or I would have missed church entirely.  So everything that could go wrong went wrong.  I had so much poop to clean - even the dog pooped in the floor!  So everyone had showers and managed to find clothes and we eventually got to church.  By this time I was in tears everytime someone asked how we were doing.  I was tired and emotional and seeing pictures posted from my husband's incredible Alaskan adventure with our son did not help me feel any better. (I am happy for them - really I am-- but the timing could not be worse!).  So getting there was tough but God showed up as He so often does through our Pastor who walks so humbly before Him and works so hard to give Christ the freedom to work.  I was so broken and so humbled by the people who offered to help.  But I really do OK during the day-- it is just those few hours when my expectations are not met and I am more tired than the little ones that I just want someone to come in and put them to bed-- SuperNanny perhaps!  No wait- i don;t want anyone to see my messy house on TV!    Sunday afternoon I could not even get them to take a nap and I was exhausted,,, but I decided to try once again to give it to God and to ask Him to change me and give me the patience and desire to love His children even when they are not obedient and even when I am tired.  I know that they need me.  As much as we are adjusting- how much more for 2 little boys who missed ot on so much mothering, who may have so many scars about bedtime and be afraid that this will all disappear, who wonder where daddy is and what is going to happen next.  I am ashamed of my impatience!  But as I said before...lack of sleep is a powerful thing!

So we had a much better night last night...wish I could say that meant everyone was asleep by 8pm--I think it was still almost 11 by the time everyone was asleep.  But something was different--  everyone was so much happier and compliant. Brandon took his blanket and laid down without incident- big change!-- and when I thought about it I think what changed was my attitude. Sleep is always tricky with new little ones and I just need to be patient and try to enjoy these new little blessings- even at bedtime. I am so thankful for my friends who are praying for me and for the encouragement of my church and for my Savior who never gives up on me and is patient with me and uses these little ones to show Me something about His Love for me. 

I hope to get more and more sleep as the transition goes on...but even if I don't, I can be thankful for my Lord who will give me strength, my friends who give me suppport and help keep me sane, and my children who won't always be little and will be grown in the blink of an eye! 

Love to all,
Glenda

Kylee and Lily Hula Hoop to Pitbull - Give me Everything

This is what happens when big brothers come for a visit... the little ones show off their skills. (disclaimer- not my choice of backgrond music.)This was taken a few weeks ago but I thought you all might enjoy it.

The Good Stuff

Not much time to write but I do have a few great pics from July 4th fun in PA fishing at the farm where Bo grew up. 

I guess I need to write more often

So here is the dilemma...do I write exactly what I am thinking and feeling and risk having someone misunderstand or more importantly my precious little ones read it one day and misunderstand.  But I think that I need to risk it and record as much of this time in our lives as possible because I know that my memory is often flawed and I will only remember the good stuff!  (which isn't a bad quality if you want to stay married for a long time!)

So the transition has been hard.  There are so many reasons-- mostly it is just too much on our plate at once.  As my dear husband says-- we have disrupted the normal life cycle and we are feeling the brunt of it.  It is not normal to be planning weddings and graduations and our little girl making the big move to college while also in the throes of potty training and sleepless nights.  It is so hard to resist the urge to be selfish and dream about how easy life cold be right now-- and we have so many reminders around us-- as our friends all laugh at us for starting all over! 

And two at once-- sounded like such as great idea in theory-- but my 17 year old summed it up well last night when she explained that it is like getting two puppies at once (sorry she and I do not mean to offend anyone with the comparision)  but when getting two puppies at once - inevitably one becomes the cute one and the favored one.  Why is it that human nature is that way?  One son smiles continuously and can win anyone over in seconds-- even when doing something bad he is just so darn cute about it!  And the other has had so much loss to deal with and has been cautious - and rightly so-  he does not smile as often (but when he does it is priceless!)  He is so smart and is learning to obey and fitting in so well.  He just wants approval and those who take the time to get to know him cannot say enough good about him. He is amazing- just takes some getting used to.  I know this could still happen if they came one at a time, but there is something about being the only one that people are willing to work a lot harder to get to know you and there is so much more attention given. 

BUT would I change it?  Not on your life.  These two are our sons and even if it is challenging, just within a few weeks they have come so far!  I have come to realize something that is hard to admit.  Their arrival has revealed the level of selfishness still in all of us, the lack of true patience, the limits of our love, the shallowness of our peace, the hold that circumstance still has on our joy, basically-- the degree to which Christ has not yet been fully formed in us.  There is an awesome book on marriage called "Sacred Marriage: what if God designed marriage not so much to make us happy as to make us holy."  Eye-opening book about how marriage can be a tool God uses to build our character and help us to become more Christ-like (if we let Him).  This adoption experience has caused me to see this as another tool God uses to 'grow us up into Him' IF we let Him.  It is hard-- but why is it hard?  because I am still selfish.  I want peace and quiet.  I want fully obedient children so that my life is easy.  I want to do what I want to do when I want to do it.  I want the house to stay clean for more than a minute and I want to take a shower ALONE!  I want to relax and enjoy life.  Forget all of that with 4 little ones! 

With our first adoption our son, Whit, labled the experience- 'the asian invasion'.  At the time I was worried about offending someone and would not repeat it. But now it has become the best way to describe this time in our lives.  This is the time of the asian invasion-- and we LOVE IT!  Yes it is a challenge..but while my friends admire their spotless house and enjoy dinner out with friends, I spend my days with amazing children getting a thousand hugs & kisses, belly laughs and marveling at all the new things they can say and do.  And I am reminded that God is not finished with me yet.  He has so much work left to do...if only I will let Him. 
So if you pray, then pray for me and for our family that will be honor God in the way we transition into this new family.

And to my older children, I am sorry for ever giving you the impression that you are not enough or taking any attention away from you.  I know that you love then but I know you wish I could do more with you. I am sorry I cannot visit as often and had to miss college orientation.  I am sorry that I cannot just spend the day with you alone.  I am sorry that my choices have affected your family life.  I just want you all to know that you guys are my inspiration.  When I see you and all that you have done in your lives and how amazing you all are, I realize that I do have something to give to these little ones.  It is my hope and prayer that your lives will be enriched by your little sisters and brothers and that you too will see Christ at work building our family.  I know it is not the same when you do not grow up together, but I pray that God will give us opportunities to be together and that He will knit your hearts together in love so that you can thank God for the asian invasion that came into your family and brought so much chaos-- I mean joy! lol!  

Love to all--
Glenda

We are still alive....for the most part

Sorry that I have been so bad at posting since returning home.  There was the jet lag and the adjustment of two little girls (and a big one) who missed mommy and daddy and now had to share them, hubby had to get back to work right away- out of town and I had to figure out how to manage on my own with 4 little ones.  Since coming home we have had our daughter's HS graduation, her Clemson Orientation with her big brother (and my car breaking down and stranding them and costing us more money!), our son-Whit returned home from the desert for a visit (and to take his sister to Tigertown), our daughter-Lindsay and her husband (and dog and cat) came for a visit during their move back closer (YAY!), both boys visited the pediatrician for shots and all that, Lily had dental surgery, Brandon had an urgent visit to the dentist- referral to MUSC- had that appointment- referred to cardiologist- had that appointment yesterday- and is now cleared to have dental surgery whenever we can get them to schedule, Brayden was found to have a heart murmur so we have his cardiologist appointment in 2 weeks.  Lauryn is coming home tomorrow from Clemson to get ready to go to PA to join her cousin on an educational trip to Costa Rica.  Lindsay & David are hoping to have a renewal of vows soon since they did not have a ceremony last year and Bryan & Sophia are planning for a ceremony next Spring.  This week- I started back with a little work with one client and one supervision session,  my sister in law celebrated her 50th birthday, yesterday our little Kylee turned 6! and my parents celebrated their 50th anniverary TODAY complete with a Hawaiian vacation that I managed to pull together for them.

So as usual our crazy, amazing life just keeps getting more and more hectic.  Bo and I have decided that we have met (probably greatly exceeded) our stress and energy level.  So all prayers are greatly appreciated!!!!! Adopting two at once is such a blessing but definitely more challenging than even each one combined-- kind of like synergy- if one horse pulls 500 pounds and another can do the same, you would expect that the two together could pull 1000 pounds but in actuality it is more like 1400 pounds.  So two adoptions at once is similar.  I wouldn't change a thing.  We love our boys and know that this was meant to be, but it is more challenging with two new ones trying to find their place in the family.  So for those who are considering it, pray about it and make sure you are ready for the challenege!

We have been blessed with a great small group who threw us a toddler shower at Chuck E Cheese for the boys and gave them clothes and toys and blessed us with meals for the first week.  We also have incredible family and friends who have let me take a shower, let the kids swim and play, and even made a beautiful cake for Kylee's birthday.

So in all honesty the past week has been a lot more crazy and less amazing...but the past month has had so much AMAZING that I will just try to remember the amazing parts and hope that the stress level decreases soon and we can settle into something kind of normal (we don't do normal so well around here-- but something close to normal would be awesome!).

Trying to keep it real,
Glenda

PS To make up for my lack of blogging, I will get some pictures posted very soon.  

ALMOST HOME

We made the LONG flight.  I don't think Brayden slept more than an hour or two at the most!  and when we tried to settle him he cried- loudly-- not fun at all.  Brandon was a real trooper- did great-- he loves planes and trains and slept most of the way.  On landing he had just woke up and was looking funny so I gave him a barf bag and he did!  Glad I saw that one coming.

 

We are waiting to board the 4:12pm flight from Newark to Charleston and ready to be home!!!!!!!!!  It feels like 4am to us and we are pretty tired but so happy to be in the US.  When we went through immigration Brandon and Brayden became US Citizens!!!!!!!!!!!

 

See you soon!

 

 

 

Heading Home

Leaving for the airport now-- no time to post pics-- Hope to see you all SOON!!!!!!!  Plane is expected to be in Charleston Sat at 6pm!!!!!!

We Made it to Hong Kong

The train ride was great but getting onto and off the train with luggage and two little guys was a challenege.  We are so thankful to have Sophia along to help.  Then we transfered to a subway like train to go to the hotel.  It was a little tougher to manage and we were all tired and hungry.  The hotel is connected to a huge mall so we walked from the train to the hotel without problems except that there were alot of people and trying to navigate our group with luggage and all was difficult.

The hotel is beautiful and we managed to get the boys a short nap before meeting everyone.  After some delays our son finally made it here about 9pm.  It was disappointing to have him delayed but it all worked out.  We have missed having him closer but he seems to be doing so well and we are so happy for him and for Sophia.  We met Sophia's parents-- they are so kind- and we all went for a traditional Cantonese dinner late last night.  We can see where Sophia gets her beauty, friendliness and strength.  her father commented on what a small world it is when two children raised so far apart can meet in yet another country.  Bo had a nice time talking to him about their shared belief in the importance of family.  It is nice to know that Sophia comes from such a nice family.

The biggest surprise of the evening for me was how Brandon-KP reacted to his biggest brother- Bryan.  It was immediate affection and connection.  Bryan was carrying him on his shoulders and they were getting into mischief together.  He wanted to sit by him at dinner.  It was amazing to see.  I forgot to bring the camera - of course-- but I will try to post some pics of them together.  It was so cute! 

We are off to see Hong Kong.  Then tomorrow we will be on a plane for HOME!  We are sad that we are missing Kylee's graduation tonight (in US) right now this morning here.  But we are so proud of her and know that she knows that we love her and miss her and will be home soon!

 

Love to all--

Glenda

A few more pictures to share before we head to HONG KONG

I wanted to post again before we leave for Hong Kong since I don't know if we will have internet there.  We thought yesterday at almost 5 pm that we should have asked if we could get the boys visas sooner to head to Hong Kong and have more time with Bryan but figured itlate to ask-- But we called and they asked me to send an email request.  They sent back the nicest email that they wanted to support the troops esp on Memorial Day weekend so they would have the boys visas ready sometime this morning so we can catch an earlier train to Hong Kong and have a little more time for the brothers to get to know each other.  It really was the nicest email!

So we have been busier than ever trying to get everything done here and packed up to go.  Bo had promised Judy and her husband another tennis lesson so he got up early this morning.  I will post a few pics of them playing.  they have had so much fun together,  Bo discovered that they both love to learn and want to play but they take turns because they only have one racket so he gave Judy a racket so they can play together and has been talking to them about the priority of marriage and doing things together.  Judy really wishes we could stay and I feel the same about her.  But at least we got to reconnect and we can stay in touch.

 

Well I gotta run...i will post a few pics for you to enjoy and hope to see you all really soon!  Saturday at 6pm if all goes as planned!

KP Brandon- our little photographer

And MORE...including Starbucks with Sophia

More Pics

Red Couch Photos

My handsome boys!

So..about those pictures I promised...

We did take some great red couch photos and some other pics, but my memory card was full-- I had a year or so of pics on the camera and I got this really bright idea since it is pretty inexpensive to have photos put onto a CD here so they did that for me this afternoon and when I got back my memory card-- it is blank!  All I can say is those pics better be on the CDs (which i cannot check on this computer)  I know what you are thinking-- really smart, huh? 

 

The good news is that most of the pictures were already down-loaded onto the computer so it is just the last few that would be missing and they should be on the CD we got.  But you will have to wait for more pictures-- the boys are napping now.

 

Thsi morning bright and early we went to the consulate and they reviewed our paperwork and gave us the oath confirming that the information about us and the boys was true and correct.   So we have our brown envelopes that we will give to the USCIS in Newark and our boys will become US citizens when we touch down on US soil.  The boys did really well this morning.  everyone is settling into a routine of sorts.  Brandon-KP has changed so much.  He needs lots of praise and loves to please.  He makes sure everyone takes off their shoes when we come into the room and makes sure we know about it so we can tell him how obedient he is!  He tells us whenever his di-di (pronounced D-D- little brother) does anything like touch something he shouldn't.  He loves Sophia and I am sure he will miss her, but he has done OK with her not being around as much and she has been preparing him that she will be going to Japan soon.  So in about 24 hours we will be getting on the train to Hong Kong-- our journey here is almost over after 3 weeks away from home.  We are ready to come home!  I have loved every minute (well except a few moments where we were spit on or I had missing children and oh yeah the being sick thing was the pits)  But like childbirth-- all that is mostly forgotten now.  Our time in china has been amazing and I havve enjoyed having 3 weeks uninterrupted with my husband -- I don;t know when that has happened in recent years!  After almost 31 years of marriage, this has been a nice get away-- busy but nice. 

 

I am so looking forward to  a real summer at home with the children.  I really believe that Brandon and Brayden will flourish with time and enjoy the girls.  It will be a tough transition I know but it will be good.  I am so anxious to introduce our boys to everyone and so we will probably try to spend time with everyone briefly right away (like if the jet lag is not too bad we will attempt church Sunday) and then we will need to try to establish a routine and work on bonding so that the boys firmly understand that we are the parents-- esp since Bo will have to go back to work-- they will need the stability of mom right now so I will have to be careful to isolate a little-- which is hard for me since I miss everyone so much!   We want you all to enjoy the boys and develop a relationship with them, but we will try to limit having others hold them or meet needs like feeding/giving treats or changing Brayden for a while.  I know it is hard to understand and when you meet them it is almost spontaneous to want to hold them -- and we won't freak out if that happens!  We just ask that you keep in mind that we need to work hard with these little guys who have been bounced around and do not really know what a family is and that we are really going to be their forever family.  Just please be patient with us and keep us in your prayers.  Pray that we will have wisdom and discernment and be faithful to meet their needs and that they will come to understand our love and begin to trust us. 

 

Thanks again for your prayers and support!

 

Love ya,

Glenda

 

so maybe last night was a little TOO relaxing and I am OUT of the running for Mother of the Year

I hesitated to share this but I know you all know and love me, right?  Well this morning, Bo went to a departure meeting with our agency and I finished up with the guys at breakfast.  We came to the room and I turned on cartoons,  I had to use the bathroom and Brayden kept bringing the stroller in and all that fun stuff that goes with toddlers. and then I heard him move toward the door but I had locked it so I thought no big deal.  But within seconds they BOTH were out the door.  So I was scrambling to put on my pants-- not fast enough as you will soon discover and opened the door and saw no one, nothing.  Panic set in!  we are right by the elevators and the boys love the elevators...but no they had to go for something closer so I see two doors open with rooms being cleaned and ask and the staff was so helpful we start down the halls while one called down to someone.  She kept assuring me it was OK, but I thought "What are they thinking?"  Mom of the year is definitely out and I sure hope I find my boys...what do I tell Bo...sorry i lost your boys in China.  It seemed like forever but all this happened within about 1-2minutes.  The lady took me down the elevator and across the way another elevator opened full of chinese people and my two boys clad in Clemson shirts.  I ran to the boys and the people all smiled.  It appears they pushed the button, the elevator opened and they joined a group for a ride down to the first floor.  Somehow word got out to the staff- I assume and we beat them down and all was well.  I brought them back to the room and double deadbolted them in and we continued on with our day....too relaxed to parent two little guys with lots of energy, intelligence, and adventure.  so embarrassing...I really have 6 other children- 4 have made it almost all to adulthood--I can do this, right?

 

We went to visit Judy again and Bo had a blast teaching her and her husband how to serve in tennis-- playing right up against the building.  they plan to go to the courts tomorrow but they all had fun today.  then we took the boys to the park.  I wished I had brought my camera.  Bo did snap a few pics on his phone and I will try to figure out how to post them.  The boys LOVED the playground and did great except that Brandon pitched a fit when we had to leave.  We came back for naps and they eventually fell asleep so I was able to catch up on blogging and now we are getting ready to go for the famous red couch photos....so there will be some pics soon...I promise.  Another day almost done so we will be home soon!

Girls Night Out- Detours...

Monday night Bo ordered a pizza for himself and the boys and Sophia invited me to go with her and her friend to have some girl-time. They took me to get a massage-  I was nervous- esp since the first time I ever had a massage was in 2006 when we adopted Kylee and I had thumb-print bruises down my back for weeks.  Sophia promised that she would be with me and tell them to ease up if needed.  And we had a really nice time together and it was a really great massage by two very sweet women. 

We left there in search of a restaurant that the ladies recommended and the first one we came to was closing so we walked a little further.  I found it humorous that when Sophia asked someone if it was a safe area to walk-- they said fairly safe....so I was a little unsure.

But just ahead was a busy beauty salon with lots of people around and I commented to Sophia that that had always looked like fun but I was too afraid of not being able to communicate and that it must cost a lot.  She assured me that it was very cheap and that she would be with me so we took a detour and had the best time!  When they shampoo your hair it is right in the chair with lots of lather and it goes on for a good 10-15 minutes.  They even wash your ears and clean them with q-tips- ever so gently.  They also give you a neck, back and arm massage and then you go back to the chair to rinse and that goes on for a while with special conditioners. Then they sat us in front of two young men who Sophia told that we just wanted a trim.  Then her guy laughed and I found out that Sophia told my guy that if he cut oo much I would hit him!  It was funny!  He was like an artist cutting each section and rechecking his work.  I was so impressed with him and wished I could go there again!  At the end I got a little nervous when he used a razor to blend my hair but it has given it more style so i was pleased with it all.  Then the best part was the bill-- it was 100RMB for both of us-- that is like $15 US.  It would have been 60 RMB except we added the special conditioners.  AND they will not accept tips here-- not at the massage place and not for hair!  We spent a long time there and had the best time and all that was so cheap!

So we walked out to get a taxi back to the hotel and saw that we were right by the Italian restaurant we had been looking for and it was still open so we took another detour.  I enjoyed eggplant spaghetti and Sophia had shrimp fetticini I think.  We talked about her life and the hopes and plans that she has.  I am so impressed with her.  She got compliments all night about her beauty and people asking if she was a movie star-- and each time she was geniunely humble and seemed surprised.  It is as if she does not know how beautiful she is.  But the thing most strikingly beautiful about her is her heart.  She is warm and caring and enjoys helping others.  I can see why she is such a great nurse.  I understand how my son fell in love with her and I am so thankful for the chance to spend time with her and see what a treasure she truly is.  It was a very special evening for me.  I know this is not the normal adoption trip but the boys had a blast with daddy and mom got a much-needed break!  Bo said Brandon did ask for me when it was time to go to bed, but he settled down OK and they both did great.  Brayden is a big-time daddy's boy all the time and never lets him out of his sight for too long so he is in for a tough time when dad heads back to work.  I am so thankful to have the summer to spend with the boys helping them to get adjusted.  They both have made such huge progress.  It is not perfect, but it is just what we all need.  God truly built our family in such a unique and precious way and they all are our children-- all 8 of them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I cannot wait to see Bryan (our first born) in Hong Kong and then be reunited with our girls and hopefully see Whit soon and have Lindsay move back closer right after we get home....my hope is to have alll my children together again in the same place at the same time sometime soon...I guess we will see if that can happen.  

There are detours in life-- those unexpected moments when you have a decision to make-- do you continue on the path you have planned or do you take a chance and do something unexpected?  Some detours are not wise and some are of little consequence, but it seems like some of the best things in my life have been detours!  So I am thankful for the detours!

Pics from dinner

Sunday in Guangzhou

I love Guangzhou!  It is a feeling of being at home even so far from home.  If I could just get all my friends and family to move here with me,I would never leave!  And Sundays are my favorite!

 

We enjoyed the awesome WS buffet breakfast and then went to the WS playroom for a little while.  When we walked in we met a RQ friend and her two new children.  We had talked so many times online that it felt like we knew each other.  It was so fun to put a name and face together!

Then we walked a block or less to the church that we visited when we adopted Kylee.  I think when we got Lily our times made it so we could not attend-- so it has been 4 1/2 years since we were there.  It is a three-self church called Christ Church Shamen.  It is approved by the government and yet we saw big changes.  The service is in English and Chinese so it is a lot of fun.  The boys did fairly well too but Brandon-KP did puch it a little.  There was a young guy with a guitar and they sang some praise songs-- we did not know them but they were newer than the style they had last time.  One one in particular the people got very excited and raised their hands to say "I am in your hands Jesus"  The Pastor spoke on John 10 about the Good Shepherd and it was very good.  Then they had an email address to send in a testimony and they would schedule you to speak.  So a man who had already done so was asked to speak and give a testimony and he explained how his grandfather had been a missionary to China from Germany and how his father was born in china and when they were all asked to leave his father wanted to come back.  So in 1980s when it reopened he wanted to return but they were only allowing foreigners to visit the big cities like Beijing and Shanghai and guangzhou.  So his dad got a train ticket from Guangzhou to Shanghai and decided to just gt off the train when they got to the province of his birth.  This caused a big scene and he was arrested but as he talked to the police, he was able to show that he just wanted to see his place of birth and was able to produce a card of himself at 15 yo with his chinese name so they decided that he was chinese (even with his big nose and Gernan looks) so they got him a driver to take him wherever he wanted to go and they found that during the 30 years or so that the missionaries left China that 'Jesus never left China."  It was so inspiring!   And as he shared, my frie3nd Judy held my arm and encouraged us to come back.  It was really awesome!.  I will post pictures of us with Judy outside of church.

In the afternoon we visited the White Swan's- amazing tropical pool.  It was hot outside but the water was a little chilly and KP was not too sure about it, but Brayden was happy as long as dad was around!  I will put a few pics of that as well.  We really enjoyed meeting and talking with other families around the pool and hearing about how God had placed these children on our hearts and how He worked to get us all to this point and how the struggles were so real at times even now with these children who have gone through so much!

Then in the evening friends of Sophia wanted to take us to dinner.  They took us to the Moon Carol Cafe Guangzhou. short ride in their car-- would be worth getting a taxi -- beats Lucy's by a mile-- grilled steaks and chicken, pork and garlic bread, pastas...can also get chinese or Thai. They said they thought we would be tired of chinese food after 2 1/2 weeks so they took us there. They insisted on buying-- we were so humbled by their generosity. Their 10year old son was so cute. He arm wrestled Bo and KP really enjoyed talking to him. By the end of the evening we were all 'good friends'. We were so impressed with how kind and friendly they all were. It is so amazing how you can find people who you can meet and become good friends in one dinner!  It truly is a small world!

Well I need to run for now- but I think you get the jest of our wonderful Sunday in Guangzhou!  I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!